I have been told that one of the joys of travelling is that you see or experience unusual things. A guy saw an umbrella on fire during a rain-storm in France. Another guy had the wheels come off his car during a test-drive on holiday in India. That sort of fun-sight, fun-thing.
I almost forget I am “travelling” here in Pattaya. I’ve been here so long that barnacles have grown on me and I am a relic of my former self. Being an expat Pattayan used to be a lot of fun but I’ve grown so long in the tooth that the average bargirl is wasting her time (and mine) when she asks me how long I’ve been here, “where you from?”, “whatyouname?”, “onedwinkforme,”….that sort of thing.
So, you can imagine my surprise at experiencing something that astonished me.
At five o’clock yesterday afternoon, rounding a corner off Soi Khao Noi, on the dark side of Pattaya, I saw two guys lying in the road, a motorbike on top of them, and a smashed whiskey bottle (really Thai rum bottle) beside them, leaking the formidable liquor from jagged edges. I am not usually over curious but I did spend enough time to see the pair right the bike, get back on, change drivers (I think), and chug off down the road, leaving the bottle to empty its last amber drops on to the hot and unforgiving road.
Yes, in a trice, that accident was righted and the only victim (not) to tell the tale was the bottle on the road. Anyone coming along thirty seconds after the pile-up would have been and, indeed, was at a loss to explain that bottle and patch, smelling of strong spirits.
Ho! Ho! HO! And you know what I think? I think the Thai guy driving was drunk, he and friend fell off and under the bike, got up, beat it, and left only one tell-tale sign of the mismanagement of that part of their spreeful afternoon.
I’ll fall off this page now, and go get a drink (of water).
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